I know I’m not alone when I say I struggle a lot with expectation. Have you ever had an idea
about how you want things to go and felt let down, anxious or a bit depressed when the outcome is different to what you imagined? I am the master of this! Disappointment when my chicken wrap arrives at a café and I realise I should have ordered the lamb (yep, talking the big issues here), disappointment when I want to go for a walk and it’s raining and disappointment when I get my hair cut and I still look like me and not Sienna Miller.
I also have expectations for the bigger things in life – career, love, family and what I should have achieved in my 32 years on the planet. Turns out I’m a bit behind schedule. Yep, my train is delayed and I’m still at the station. But does it matter?
I was out for a drink with a friend a few months ago and we were bemoaning the working week, lack of quality single men in Melbourne and shrivelling ovaries and I suddenly just got really tired of it. This conversation wasn’t a one off, it was happening a lot. And I’m not putting the blame on others, I was the one instigating the agenda and it was actually rather boring, not to mention, unhelpful.
I wouldn’t say it was a bolt of lightening moment but I felt different as I left this bar and walked home. The truth is I have an extraordinary life. I can claim an amazing family, fantastic friends and, most importantly, good health. I had to let my expectations about all the other stuff stop running a negative riot over my everyday experiences.
Our outlook and decisions are all within our control. I realised I could totally get bogged down by what I thought I should be doing or I could acknowledge I had expectations, accept that the circumstances were different and move on. Sounds simple and it is but you need to practice.
I gradually flirted more and more with the idea that everything is exactly as it is meant to be. I am perfect in this moment and nothing needs to change. This doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have goals or things I want to achieve but life was going to roll on regardless of whether I approved of my current lot or not so it was probably easier to just accept what is in front of me today.
As a result, in the last few months I’ve been a pretty happy camper. It’s not that my life is hassle free or without it’s challenges but things have been, well, easier – my life is just whatever it is today and I’ll do my best to make the most of it.